this comes from deep within

A girl like me can only dream, try her very best, and at the end of the day, leave it to fate. I guess that is what i am going to do right now. Life has completely turned around in just a single day. And i am totally lost right now. I have been crying every hour thinking what did i do wrong. All that i have imagined and planned came crushing like an earthquake.


Even if i feel like putting the blame to someone for this nightmare, i am not sure if i want to do that. I am not quite sure what i am supposed to do now. Whether to leave it to fate to settle our problem or try our very best to make things right. But this crying doesnt want to stop at the moment and producing tears is like breathing the air to me.


As everyone has been saying, things happen for a reason. I believe there should be something that both me and fauzan need to learn after the accident. Honestly, life has been nothing but heartache and it is horrible after the incident at the hospital yesterday. I feel so sick emotionally, mentally, and physically and all i want to do is cry my heart out hoping that things will change.


I dont want to give up just yet. But it takes two to tango. Fauzan, this relationship will not work if i am being left alone to strive what we both have been wanting. Im ready to do whatever it takes to make things better even if it means to leave my jeans behind.


Dear Allah, you know what is best for me. I pray to you to show and lead me where i am supposed to be. Please give me strength that i need to overcome this. Ameen.



Jehan 23/6/2008